Rod! You really are perfect material for Saturday Night Live!! You're such a joke!!
Anon14
· 11 months ago
Two years ago I was telling everyone I loved you this much!
wordslinger
· 11 months ago
"Ambassador? Cabinet secretary? You want me to get Warren Buffett to do what? Stop it Rod, you're killing me!"
mr clean
· 11 months ago
hahaha A cabinet position? you want a cabinet position? hahaha!
HoBoSkillet
· 11 months ago
It's golden I tell ya.... It's ^insert Gov's favorite word here^ golden!
VanillaMan
· 11 months ago
"Then Tony hands me a sack of cash this big, and I'm like, "Woa! Wait a minute dude! What ever happened to those account numbers I gave you? NO cash, remember!"
been there
· 11 months ago
"Ya see, Rod. There's the U.S. Constitution and there's the Illinois Constitution and then there are laws and then there are ethics."
wordslinger
· 11 months ago
Rod: "What do you mean funny? What, funny like a clown? I amuse you, I'm here to amuse you? How am I funny? What's so bleepin funny about me?"
Rob_N
· 11 months ago
Wouldn't it be funny if I was sworn in as President a week and a half after you get impeached...? Good times.
S. Illinois
· 11 months ago
And we're stopped there at the curb and this little girl comes up and asks me, "are you Bobby Rush?"
BandCamp
· 11 months ago
RRB: No, really, I think I could be President some day...er...dontcha think?
Mr. Ethics
· 11 months ago
There is an ethics class at UIC tomorrow. I want you to attend.
Pat Collins
· 11 months ago
And the petition for pardon forms are THIS high.
Vote Quimby!
· 11 months ago
He like me! He really likes me!!
Anonymous Coward
· 11 months ago
"Gee, how can I word this.... Can I touch your hair?"
Edward Morgan Blake
· 11 months ago
"That's a hell of an act you got there, what do you call it?" Barack said.
"The Aristocrats!"
Muskrat
· 11 months ago
I'm telling, you, Obama, you'll never get anywhere in politics with cropped-short hair like that. Look at me! Hair makes the man! It's a Follicularly valuable thing! Let it grow!
Ahem
· 11 months ago
Blagojevich (muttering): "Barack, stop making that pantomine! There's a photographer!"
RJW
· 11 months ago
RRB with a nervous laugh: "You're going to pardon me, right?"
Commonsense in Illinois
· 11 months ago
Oh look, a kitty...
GOP'er
· 11 months ago
Sorry Rod, I just washed my hands of this popsicle stand.
Sarbanharble
· 11 months ago
"Rod, I'm not Santa Claus! Now, get off my knee and stop asking me for things."
Jim
· 11 months ago
Can you believe how many idiots we got to vote for us?
Anon
· 11 months ago
BO: "From the bottom of my heart, Rod, you have my sincere appreciation for all you've done for me."
RB: "Your appreciation means more to me than all the gold in Fort Knox."
downhereforyears
· 11 months ago
Rod " Barack you really must believe me, I would never try to sell your senate seat...however I will give it to whomever you want if I can be your choice for Commerce Secretary"
carbon deforestation
· 11 months ago
"Rod, so I said to Emil "All I have to do is give your family members jobs and pay raises and you'll back me no matter what?"
"All you need to do is help the guy out, and he'll have your back. I'm telling you Rod, he's bleeping golden."
i've been Rod-omized
· 11 months ago
Rod, tell me how this goes again. -Five dollar. Five dollar. Five dollar footlong.
underdog
· 11 months ago
So how was your holiday break?
the Other Anonymous
· 11 months ago
Barack Obama (D-President-elect) and Rod Blagojevich (D-Impeachment) compare their testicular virility.
midstate moderator
· 11 months ago
B.O.: So I put the box on his desk and he opens it, only to find a knitted sweater from my mother in law instead of $5,000
R.B.: (under his breath) I bet you would do something like that. Better yet, you'll probably leave me hanging out to dry in a few months.
Nero
· 11 months ago
"Pardon me... Mr. President-elect."
montrose
· 11 months ago
BO -And then in the dream...get this...you top it all by trying to sell my old senate seat. Saying you wanted a cabinet post or something like that. Then there was the arrest and the impeachment process. It ended with Burris of all people flying to D.C. and demanding to be seated as a Senator. Burris! Hilarious..."
Louis G. Atsaves
· 11 months ago
Mr. President, I'm appointing Roland Burris to succeed you!
midstate moderator
· 11 months ago
OOPS!!! I dropped your golden parachute.
Not a Fan
· 11 months ago
It was only a little lie. Right Rod?
Anon
· 11 months ago
I can't belive its you and not me!! It should have been me...Why Why Why
Anon
· 11 months ago
B.O.: Don't sell yourself short Rod, you're a tremendous slouch
Ken in Aurora
· 11 months ago
"Don't worry, Rod - orange jumpsuits are thinning!"
babs
· 11 months ago
Rod: Come on - look at me - let me in this conversation - what's so funny? - please, don't ignore me - look at me.
BO: balloon over his head - get this guy away from me. He keeps following me around. He's bleeping clinging. When will I get secret service protection?
anon
· 11 months ago
Birds of a Feather-------------
jerry
· 11 months ago
Rewind to 2002...
Rod: "ya know what Barack, one day one of us will be President"
Barack: *laughs*
OneMan
· 11 months ago
Obama: The state has festavus pole?
Rod: Yeah
Obama: Well I suspect the line of people waiting to tell you how you disappointed them is going to like this x 17 Million
Dantana
· 11 months ago
You did it wrong. You took a $1,500 check. Too traceable. I just had Tony buy my house.
Anon
· 11 months ago
B.O. to himself:
Note to self: Get to these events earlier so you don't have to sit next to the guy that's on double secret probation!
Nuance
· 11 months ago
RB - How do you think this smile looks for the future mug shots? BO - Bleepin Golden.
David Starrett
· 11 months ago
The fish was only this big, but I fed millions!
Levois
· 11 months ago
Back when Rod Blagojevich was actually hilarious...
Anon14
· 11 months ago
BO: Ok, I give up, how puffy do you intend to get your hair helmet!
Jake from Elwood
· 11 months ago
How many points did you score off of Gin-ool-ee-us? Really? Have you seen my new fetal position stretch? I am thinking of working it into my fitness routine.
Amuzing Myself
· 11 months ago
Obama:
"So...you'll still be Governor, and I'll be elected President.... Over here in Illinois, the feds are going to finally get you, and over here, I'll be in DC waiting to be inaugurated having to deal with your mess when I'm supposed to be having the time of my life. It's going to be a mess, man!"
Amuzing Myself
· 11 months ago
That should have read "...bleeping mess..."
SIMPSON'S WRITER
· 11 months ago
Do you believe that they are going to write me in the next episode?
Macoupin County Kid
· 11 months ago
"I'm serious, they're locking Ryan up. What a nimrod."
cynically anonymous
· 11 months ago
Seriously, I'm telling you - washing dishes is incredibly relaxing. Just don't talk about it in front of the missus.
NIEVA
· 11 months ago
And when this is all over I am going to put on my Panama hat a roll a doobie this big!!!
Vote Quimby!
· 11 months ago
MRB: You know, what the Feds say was on those tapes what I said about you, that's just trash talk, you know, heat of the battle stuff...I sincerely value your appreciation and no hard feelings, right? BHO: The padded walls in your cell need to be at least THIS thick.
Mommy
· 11 months ago
Its so funny that people believe me when I tell them I had nothing to do with the selling of the senate seat.
Say WHAT?
· 11 months ago
BO: You see Rod, theres this thing about ethics....
Rod: Yeah, I wrote the book on ethics in state government. You like how I make all those idiots take that ethics test? Pretty cool, huh?
trafficmatt
· 11 months ago
"OK, and then I thought, I'll just do an Elvis impersonation for Harry Reid, they love Elvis out there in Las Vegas. And then it gets better, Roland will play Sammy Davis, Jr., and we'll have a whole sketch comedy thing going. It will be hilarious!!!!"
Say WHAT?
· 11 months ago
i've been Rodomized: Five Dollar Footlong - LOL! Hillarious!
In the Land of Silos and Cows
· 11 months ago
BHO "That is too funny. Tell it to me again ... so ... Fitzgerald contacts you to talk ... and you blow him off. Fitzgerald then picks you up on a complaint, and you face a federal judge in a jogging suit...then, they have tapes where you swear like a 'drunken sailor, and THEN you appoint someone anyway... stop, my side hurts!"
RB "I know, I am a (bleep)in genius."
the ole precinct captain
· 11 months ago
Are you kidding me Rod, the supeona's you have been given are that wide. You'll make the corruption Hall of Fame with that.
J28
· 11 months ago
BO: Your an idiot. I'm going to make sure they put you in a cell this big.
RB: Your the idiot that's not enough space for my hair let alone the ego that's under it.
zatoichi
· 11 months ago
I think he believes me.
Prison Bound
· 11 months ago
RB: What should I drop in the prison shower first, the soap or my towel?
sneaker
· 11 months ago
RB "So you can get me in the same cell with George - right?" BO "Are you talking to me?."
Anon-13
· 11 months ago
You have to give me more than a *bleeping* five dollar foot long. How about some appreciation?
Throw me a bone.....
· 11 months ago
And get this....I blame it all on Patti
Ken
· 11 months ago
Pardon Me
plutocrat03
· 11 months ago
.... and the I will say that I will be selling your seat....
Larry Mullholland
· 11 months ago
BO: "I am gonna tell em that you are just a guy in the from the (bleepin) neighborhood".... bbbwwwwaaaa hhaaahaa
Speaking at Will
· 11 months ago
BHO: (circa 2002)
Rod, I would like you to do an extensive under cover study of the Judicial and Corrections system in Illinois over the next 6 or 8 years. I dont care how you handle it, but get back to me on what you find once your done.
W Thomas Payne
· 11 months ago
Rod, that mustard stain is NEVER coming out of these pants.
Desert Dweller
· 11 months ago
5....5 dollar....5 dollar foot long.
Terrence
· 11 months ago
Vose's corndogs are at least this long...
Eileen Left
· 11 months ago
Show me your Obamas!
Suburban Republican
· 11 months ago
Have you seen Oprah lately?
Ahem
· 11 months ago
Barack: "You put your right foot in, You put your right foot out; You put your right foot in, And you shake it all about. You do the Hokey-Pokey, And you turn yourself around. That's what it's all about!"
Rod: "Oh, look, a camera! Take my picture!"
DHee
· 11 months ago
Jim @ 11:23 can't be topped.
Steve
· 11 months ago
Remember that place on W. Division street?
Can't Use My Nickname
· 11 months ago
And I asked Rezko for only "this much of his property" by the side of my house......and Rezko gave me a great price.
jimbo
· 11 months ago
Yeah Rod, I really think you should take that ethics test all employees under you take. Oh, and for a change pay attention!
FLOUNDER
· 11 months ago
BUSINESS AS USUAL,AND I HAVE ETHICS YOO!
Marianne
· 11 months ago
I have 2:
1. "Text Me?"
2. "I tried dogmeat, too!"
good ol' country boy
· 11 months ago
Obama-- You see Gov, the feds can take a recorder about this size, and attach it to your phones and record conversations you are having on incoming and outgoing calls.
Rod--Really! Wow...Gosh Barack sure wish I would have known that. I sure would have watched what I said on the phone. Hey you think maybe you could give me one of those pardons?
good ol' country boy
· 11 months ago
Yours is really that beeping big? Gosh mine isn't....
Ronnie Gardocki
· 11 months ago
2 peas in a pod
Tom
· 11 months ago
You know Rod, that thing with Resko could have cost me the election and now you want a favor? You are truly one of a kind. But seriously, no cabinet position, no pardon and yes, no job for Patty
Benevolent Dictator
· 11 months ago
BO: It's easy, Rod, if you look on the map, Chicago is here and Springfield is just down the road here.
All Comments
"The Aristocrats!"
RB: "Your appreciation means more to me than all the gold in Fort Knox."
"All you need to do is help the guy out, and he'll have your back. I'm telling you Rod, he's bleeping golden."
R.B.: (under his breath) I bet you would do something like that. Better yet, you'll probably leave me hanging out to dry in a few months.
BO: balloon over his head - get this guy away from me. He keeps following me around. He's bleeping clinging. When will I get secret service protection?
Rod: "ya know what Barack, one day one of us will be President"
Barack: *laughs*
Rod: Yeah
Obama: Well I suspect the line of people waiting to tell you how you disappointed them is going to like this x 17 Million
Note to self: Get to these events earlier so you don't have to sit next to the guy that's on double secret probation!
BO - Bleepin Golden.
"So...you'll still be Governor, and I'll be elected President.... Over here in Illinois, the feds are going to finally get you, and over here, I'll be in DC waiting to be inaugurated having to deal with your mess when I'm supposed to be having the time of my life. It's going to be a mess, man!"
BHO: The padded walls in your cell need to be at least THIS thick.
Rod: Yeah, I wrote the book on ethics in state government. You like how I make all those idiots take that ethics test? Pretty cool, huh?
RB "I know, I am a (bleep)in genius."
RB: Your the idiot that's not enough space for my hair let alone the ego that's under it.
BO "Are you talking to me?."
Rod, I would like you to do an extensive under cover study of the Judicial and Corrections system in Illinois over the next 6 or 8 years. I dont care how you handle it, but get back to me on what you find once your done.
You put your right foot out;
You put your right foot in,
And you shake it all about.
You do the Hokey-Pokey,
And you turn yourself around.
That's what it's all about!"
Rod: "Oh, look, a camera! Take my picture!"
1. "Text Me?"
2. "I tried dogmeat, too!"
Rod--Really! Wow...Gosh Barack sure wish I would have known that. I sure would have watched what I said on the phone. Hey you think maybe you could give me one of those pardons?